1. I do not judge your body. I see the anatomy, the muscles, the origins and the insertions and the landmarks that help me know where to work. There is no such thing as a perfect body. Accept your cellulite, curves and unshaven legs.... I do.

2. I did actually train for this job and it was bloody hard work. It cost me a lot of time and a lot of money, both when I trained and all the ongoing education over the years. I am worth whatever I choose to charge!

3. Anyone can call themselves a massage therapists in Australia and don't need any formal qualification to do so. Don't assume that the person who is treating you is qualified. Ask them what their experience and training is. A weekend course at the local community center is not adequate training for professional practice. The common, Nationally recognized qualifications are the Certificate IV in Massage, the Diploma of Remedial Massage and the Advanced Diploma of Myotherapy.

4. If you go for a massage and they don't at least ask your name, record a brief medical history and ask you to sign a consent form before they start.... Don't walk away...RUN AWAY. The massage may feel good but they are breaking the law.

5. All massage therapists should use clean, fresh linen for every client. If the linen on the treatment table is not clean, either ask for it to be changed in front of you or head for the door. Many dodgey places will simply flip the towel between clients to save on laundry. If they cut corners there... what else is happening behind the scenes you can't see?

6. I work in a Massage Clinic not a Massage Parlor and I am a Remedial Massage Therapist not a Masseuse and no... it's not funny when you joke about "happy endings".

7. Yes, my hands do get tired at the end of the day and it is hard work. You know what I do though, when my body is sore? I book a massage!!

8. No, my husband is not the "luckiest guy around". He rarely gets a massage and when he does it's with a colleague of mine that charges normal rates.

9. I can't fix 10 years of pain in a 45 minute session. I'm good but I'm not that good..

10. Massage feels damn good. It doesn't have to hurt to work and the "no pain no gain" philosophy is wrong. If I am causing you pain I am not doing my job right.